My Future

I expect my future to be grand. I have lived from fear of my future for so long, but I'm learning that He has not given me grace in vain. He didn't choose poorly when He poured out His blood and beauty over my life.

I am still dealing with the fear that my future will be small and insignificant. The Holy Spirit has shown me that God does not dream small dreams. He is not a dreamer of insignificant dreams. every destiny that He holds for us is meant to be realized. I've had such a clear picture of what my life plan would be, and it's grand and beautiful and thrilling. I haven't wanted to give it over to Him because I've been afraid that He will take it away and replace it with something tiny. I still need to reach the place where whatever it looks like doesn't matter, as long as my life is pointing back to Him.

I know that if I am surrendering myself in every step, I will never feel like my life is empty. I know that. It hasn't settled into my heart yet, and that's okay. I feel such an overwhelming grace for it, because He knows how precious those dreams are to me, and He's not trying to pry them out of my grip, but He wants to hold them because they'll be better once He does.

^^^that was written two weeks ago. Since then, it's been such a gentle, surprisingly fast process of reminders from the Holy Spirit that have reframed the way I think about my future.

I am not afraid. I have times when doubt begins to make me lose perspective, but then I speak truth to myself and reach out for the Holy Spirit to remind me of what I already know.

God is not in a hurry, which means that as His children, we aren't meant to be in a hurry either. The value of our lives is not a zoomed-out picture of all that we accomplished and how it affected this earth. The value of our lives is the moment to moment grace and love poured out on our hearts that we respond to, each choice creating a ripple in a way we don't know.

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