Grace

Haha, so this is a post I wrote but never published. I wrote it...maybe three years ago? If not longer lol

A lot has changed in me, and I would like to think I've gained more perspective and maturity. Let's see if I actually have. 

 I fully believe that grace is the message of my life.

Do ya now? You believe that you have special claim to knowing God's grace like no one else? You? haha no. More accurately, you want to feel spiritual, you want to feel like your story is unique. And you want to emulate the spiritual leaders you are listening to right now, which means you need a message for your life, an over arching theme.

It has settled into the cracks of my heart like nothing else, revealing how much I lack it, and how much it can solve. The first part of that sentence sounds good, but I don't really know what I meant by "cracks of my heart" lol  I did and still do lack it, and it can solve so much, that's true. 

My name is Evangeline Grace, or "bringer of the good news of grace". When I first felt grace pressed upon my heart, I thought it was just a really cool coincidence, but now I 100% believe that it is declaring my destiny. I know that may sound naive and like I am looking for something that isn't there, but it feels ingrained into my very being.

Again, girl you were reaching hardcore. Yeah your name has a cool meaning, but do you really think that it is a prophecy over your life? What if your parents had named you something that meant Toilet Water?  

Grace is such a foundational part of the Christian walk, it is a direct expression and outpouring of God's love that we experience every single moment we inhale and exhale. Our lives are completely soaked in grace.

Duh. You really thought you understood something others didn't just because you were finally experiencing a relationship with God. Also, your understanding of grace was so shallow, grace by human's definition, what makes sense and feels good to us. 

I named this blog (and I will one day name my devotional) Grace for Grace after John 1:16 "And of His fullness have all we received, and grace for grace." That verse is mindblowing to me. Absolutely mindblowing. We have been given the fullness of God, His full attention, His full heart, His full love, peace, creativity, joy, etc. We have been given access to that!  Grace would be a part of God's fullness, yet the verse specifies: grace for grace. Grace in the place of grace, like waves overlapping on sand. A never ending refreshing of grace on the shores of our hearts.

Please don't write a devotional. I beg of you. Unless your pen is moved by God Himself, you are not smart enough, and that is a good thing. You don't have to try and impress anyone with your spiritual maturity. No one is expecting you to be wise! The grace is constant, and continuously and freely given when we just reach out. Even the fact that I have the prompt to reach out is grace itself. 

When I dwell on John 1:16, I am struck by the freedom a relationship with God brings. Grace for grace is not allowance, but it is an invitation to come back, no punishment or strings and that is so sweet. 

And it isn't a passive thing either. God hasn't set up an automated response that doles out grace when we need it like an ATM. It is a constant choice for Him as we live our lives. Because His attention is fully on me, and fully on you (don't ask how He does it, I just know that He does), He is completely invested in each choice and emotion directed towards us.

I mean, she's not wrong. Again, I thought that I had discovered the truth of God's nature and I had to share it with everyone. 

There is grace for ignorance, but it is not permission to continue in ignorance.

I think that people would be less stressed and performance driven if they just let go of their need to fix things and stood in grace for a bit. Don't get me wrong, God does not reveal things without a solution in mind, but I fully believe that there are periods of grace where we have to be okay that we messed up, to bask in the perfect grace of God. His love is not fragile, it doesn't go away, so why do we have to stress? We don't have to find a solution out of panic. There is not a deadline on our breakthrough.

Since we have received the fullness of God's grace, it requires us to look at others differently. "the Jews would not willingly step on any piece of paper, because the name of God might be written upon it. the same goes for our hearts. we cannot willingly trample on any human heart because God's name may be written there, a work of grace just beginning". part of living from grace requires learning how to recognize the preexisting grace in other's lives, and honoring what has been begun. the work of grace was started over every heart the moment that Jesus took on our sin. He thought of that heart as He was dying, and even if that's all that will ever happen, nothing else coming from that life than a thought in our Christ's mind, that gives value enough that we cannot do intentional harm to that life. 


As prideful and shallowly passionate as I was, thinking I was swimming in the deep of a relationship with God like none of my peers had experienced, I am so fond of that whole time period where everything was new and exciting. It was a very sweet foundation that I am still reaping the fruit and stability of.

I had so much to learn but I was so earnest. I am grateful for the graciousness of God and the Holy Spirit to love my process and not withhold presence or love. 

I am also grateful that my relationship with God does feel so tangible and real. I don't wonder, I know He is with me, and I don't want to take that for granted. It would be easy for an invisible and undefinable God to feel far away, but He's not.